The Great Indian Service Class!

With a change of job I get to travel within the city everyday these days..  Earlier my office was outside the main city & so didn’t have this experience for a long time… City has obviously changed and “so-called” urbanization has taken its toll; roads are jammed, traffic is slow & most of all the colour green is visible in patches… very few of them unfortunately…

I get to see all types of residential developments & hoardings with builders trying to lure you into deals which makes them richer & gets the hard-earned money from “some folks”..

Who are these “some folks” for whom these offers are being fashioned… Someone who has a stash of black/blue/brown colour cash doesn’t need an offer as these are just opportunities to change the colour of cash… So who is the target…

The city is divided into areas, some are “posh” some “affordable, there are some “new-city-on-their-own” and some are solely targeting at “IT people” which seems a bit frivolous as the “on-paper” & “in-hand” status of an IT person is the stuff of legends.

The “posh” ones generally don’t have offers as this is meant for folks with coloured cash…

So that only leaves “Service Class” who are the potential targets for all these budget, smart & affordable property offers…

Service class people don’t make money… they save money…

They work hard so that someday they will be eligible for an offer... so the offer is not for these people.. But people make themselves fit for one…

At some point these folks will achieve the target & be proud owners of one… but is this what they really want?

Service class are dreamers… yes they live on planet earth but they dream the universe… the other set of people get to live the dream or maybe for them it is not really a dream… but for The Great Indian Service Class the dream is the ultimate ecstasy…

They dream of a large house in the “posh” area but settle for affordable homes…

They dream of the luxury sedan & cruise control but settle for the hatchback with low maintenance...

They dream of 5-star luncheons but opt for the budget restaurant…

Most of all they dream of dying rich…

So does this make them losers… I think not... On the contrary this is the precise set of people who lead the urbanization & development of the city… every change is triggered from a common man’s problem..

People stuck in traffic jam... leads to road development... & who travels on the street?

Residential properties springing up everywhere… which set of people now have the power to buy!

Malls & multiplexes opening in galore... well folks need entertainment & ofcourse the source of more dreams!!!

Progress today is making the rich richer & poor poorer…. But the Service Class... the middle layer… strong & steady leads the way…

Kudos to “The Great Indian Service Class”, proud to be part of it!!!

Sakhar Zhop….Sugar Sleep….Subah ki Meethi Meethi Neend….

It happens after about 5 secs after your alarm rings… your brain knows that you have to wake up.. and your heart wants a little more time to sleep…between the brain and heart there is a calculation which tells you that you can have 10 mins more if you are not planning to wash your hair or have breakfast or cook in the morning… any task that you can omit and use that time to sleep is identified and on completing the calculation…. The heart tells the brain…. Well 10 mins.. only 10 mins I will wake up…..  as you close your eyes and reminisce about the events of the previous night… a tiny smile plays on your lips…and the mind moves to a happy place….

I call this ‘Snooze’ sleep….

Now at this point if there is no trigger to wake you up… you will go to into deep sleep & even have some dreams… only to wake up in a panic state and make a run for it…!! I know this, as today morning I went into snooze sleep for about 50 mins… well I had the most wonderful dream… There was this guy in the dream… and he was… well is… pretty perfect… but…  there are always “buts” to any good thing in life…

So you can have cake.. but you will put on weight…

You can drive as fast as you want.. But there can be an accident..

You can sleep as much as you want… But you won’t get any work done… and so on…

But.. :) this piece is not about the dream.. nor the guy in the dream(I could write an essay about him).. or the ‘Buts’ in life…

It is about ‘Snooze’ Sleep…

The extra sleep after alarm rings… the extra sleep when you know that beyond a certain point you cannot sleep anymore…

This short nap is precious.. I have no idea why…

You can sleep as much as you want on a weekend…but the joy of ‘Snooze’ sleep cannot be matched…

In Marathi(which is my mother tongue) we have a name for it… ‘Sakhar Zhop’ (Sugar Sleep) and in the National Language… Meethi Meethi Neend…

One peculiar thing about this nap is.. incase you have a dream.. it is always a good one… something that makes you smile… Hence the reference to sweet sugar in the name I think…

Like the one with the perfect guy… or the one where I have conquered the world… or a scene with Mr Khan & me … my dreams at this point are pretty standard girly stuff.. but always good ones… Snooze Sleep has no bad dreams… and I think for this reason we wish them to come true…. I always hope they do…

Snooze Sleep in my books counts as the ‘perks’ of life… small moments of joy… they go unnoticed and are forgotten many times..  mostly we don’t give a second thought to this event as it is mundane and happens too often…

However the next time you do have a Snooze sleep.. and wake up.. give yourself a moment to feel this happy feeling…

If it was accompanied by a dream… give a thought to that dream.. it could just be a reflection of what you really want in life.. or just a recollection of a good memory…

You will definitely have a small happy moment in your life.. life after all is made of thousands of tiny happy & very happy moments right?

So once the alarm rings… Have a nice Sakhar Zhop…!!!!

Weekend in Ipswich…!

I have been in the UK for about 20 days now… and finally I feel like I have settled in… I even came up to speed on the ‘Normal’ weekend activities that I’m supposed to do…

What do I mean by ‘Normal’…..  well on an average all Indians who live in “Onsite” locales do a set of activities in a recurring manner… every weekend….
To a person coming from our “bustling with activity” country these tasks would seem pretty mundane… even outright boring… but for the trying-to-fit-in-Angrezy-land-desi this is inevitable…. Here goes the list….

1. Cleaning – unlike India this can be done once a week… don’t we love the cold countries where there is no dust… no dust = no cleaning everyday… Life can’t be this easy though… don’t get excited…  so what’s the catch… try “hovering” the invisible dust.. you will miss the “zhadooo”…  yes you will… coz this wonder of technology gives you sore arms… sore back… n takes forever… Miss you Mr Broom…
2. Weekly shopping – this refers to stocking up your fridge with milk, juice, fruits, veggies and frozen fattening stuff…The Indian bargaining germ is on full alert… the style of bargaining here is not to tell the guy in ‘Sainsbury’ – ‘Oye 10 ka 2 de,, nahi toh rehne de main doosri dukkan se le loongi’… But we need to figure out the ‘doosri dukkan’… it involves Data collection(asking other “settled” desis where & what), Analysis(mapping to what I need to where I get and costs involved), Planning (checking how much time and distance to walk to achieve best results) and of course Reporting (updating in “short reckonings” to do hisaab with roomates)… the most interesting activity is data collection coz I have information like below:
   1. Sugar is cheaper in QD than Sainsbury.. same sugar but cheaper.. I don’t understand the English…
   2. Get Indian stuff from Sri-Lankan… This guy runs an Indian shop.. but Sri Lankans apparently are more popular this side of the UK then Desis and so they rule….!
   3. Don’t buy anything from Patel… but whenever you ask where I will get ‘Something’.. the answer is Patel’s, but don’t buy he sells everything ‘mehenga’.. I have not been there even once.. but the number of times his name is mentioned tops the Sri Lankans and all other Asian shops put together.. nobody seems to buy anything from him though…I think it is primarily coz his shop is on the other side of everything.. (check PS for everything).. we also have the lazy gene within so…. don’t buy stuff from Patel.. but keep talking about him… recently a friend of mine enlighted me on the mystery… apparently Miss Patel is the reason for all the ‘Patel’s Jao’ hoppla… men will be men… and suddenly it all makes sense…!
   4. Poundland… buy everything there… 1 pound.. go crazy… yeah just coz it is 1 pound do you have to pick everything..??

I have heard all this with an open mind.. but every time I can’t help think how Indian brain functions… we just never get over doing the conversions in our heads.. even someone as poor in maths as me can do very fast conversions in my head… it is a Miracle…!

3. India calling – Weekend is the only time we make long calls home… really long…. Well Indians like talking.. and people like me like talking even more.. so I call up people… over the last 3 weekends I have called up people I have not called in months.. Calls are like

‘Hi Prajakta here…”
“ ohhh Prajakta, it has been so long…”
“ yeah I know…  I’m in UK actually..”
“Oh when did you go, didn’t tell while going na…”
“ya it all happened in the blink of an eye(complete lie) didn’t get time to call…”
“oh you never call..”(as if they call me everyday)
“aare so I called you as soon as I got here, just been a week…”
“oh that is sweet, when you come back we will meet up(this is lie from the other side)…”
“ya sure, I hope all is well.. blah blah blah…” .
It makes them happy and it gives me something to do… Sab khush…! Not that I don’t enjoy these calls… but point is there are happening coz I’m here…!!
Bolo…. 1p per min ki Jai…!!!

4. Planning for other weekends – This is the fun activity… when sunshine hits sleepy towns in UK everyone gets on the feet and in the street… literally… and it gets the Indians excited too… and we plan.. Switzerland.. Scotland.. or simple trip to London… all in advance… cheaper tickets is the catch to the all the planning..  But this is fun…  Take a tour or if you are more adventurous plan your own trip… hotels, BnBs or caravans.. loads of options to stay… this phase also gives as much pleasure as the trip would.. and trust whether you do it here or in India… planning trips for people like me gives super adrenaline kick…!!
5. Go on the planned trip – yeah some weekends are spent doing activities planned on point 4…  and these are probably the best weekends.. I’m yet to experience the sweets of patience aka ‘Sabra ka fal meetha hota hai’ feeling…  but for now waiting for this weekend to happen

Moral of the story… Weekends here are slow and the DIY stuff turns you into a bore… but then this is the reason men from IT world are eligible bachelors… they learn to cook, clean and shop… and I think they start to appreciate women a little more…
As for girls… we are perfect and perfection cannot be improved…!!!
Anyways I did 4 out of 5 activities on my second weekend here… So I guess I’m settling in!!
PS: Everything in Ipswich is a set of 4 streets… which is called Towncenter…  anything beyond is far by Ipswich standards and people will only go as far as the Towncenter to get anything….
PPS: ‘He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named’ was born in Ipswich in real life… I found this after scavenging for fun facts and trivia about Ipswich…  But that’s about it.. the only interesting thing about Ipswich… This is a village… and I have to get my mind to adjust to slow life….

Rainy day...

Rains… sheets of water… falling like the sky had burst out… 26^th July… the day that Mumbai will never forgot is also a day that made me realize the strength of a “common” man, of a true Mumbaikar; so it is one of the best rainy experiences for me….

We were stuck in office… Frantic phone calls ensued and a tense atmosphere enveloped us all. People were ready to walk home as they couldn’t bear to wait in anticipation… it was a long night…

As we started receiving the updates of how Mumbai was coping with the disaster we went from shock to surprise to pride… The roads were filled, people were walking back home in neck deep water… And as the typical nature of government any sort of action was certainly absent… but Mumbaikars are self made and we heard stories of how food was provided to people trying to walk home, how help was given to anyone with complete disregard to own safety… Mumbai carried on… And within two days was back on its feet…

This was the night that I realized, that even though this age is termed as “Kalyug” we still have these brave souls, people with spirit to enlighten you, touch your life without any boisterous promises or burning “buses” in the name of religion and culture…

And though this was a very tragic day I will always remember it with pride.

Punekar (In love with Mumbai)

Hello..!!

Riding in a car... chatting with friends….enjoying the “green” view… listening to Kishore…

Mac: You girls always trouble me a lot... from tomorrow go by office bus… don’t come with me in my car…

Aps: ok ok… (With sly smile knowing Mac is just kidding… she never takes him seriously anyways)

Me: Nooooo.. Please Mac… I was just kidding… I like the extra sleep I get… (In my mind) I hope he is not serious… I don’t want to go by bus…. Why does this happen to me… why why…???

This is how my journey to the new office goes everyday (it has been a week now)…

Having moved to Hinjewadi office I have mini picnics (which refers to the ride to & fro) everyday… The location of the office makes me think that my company is taking employee ‘Health’ very seriously… It is in Hinjewadi phase 3… in the middle of nowhere (literally)… tiny hillocks on all sides, no pollution, fresh air 24/7 and to top it all, lifts are not installed yet… so ‘trek’ up five floors is everyday workout (at least twice a day as canteen is on ground floor)… Anyways the reason for writing this piece is twofold… firstly logging happy times is good practice, I really enjoy coming to this office… Secondly if God calls up (dunno how he got my number)... it is something that you have to record…. But as He started talking my head was trying to figure whose silly prank this must be…

Stop it… He said... stop thinking and listen to me for a change… He gave me verification to prove who he was (which cannot be disclosed... security reasons)…. Well my mind accepted ‘This is God’… and as soon as it did, being the cribbing kind, started compiling a list for Him… it started with… well ‘Why’...

But before I could commence He started…….. Cribbing……

God: Why do you think Shahrukh Khan is God?

Me: Oh that… I don’t... I just say that... I don’t mean it… I just love him that’s all…

God: Well does he listen to all the cribbing you do?

Me: Mmm…

God: Why is that you don’t think of him when you are in trouble…??

Me: Hmm... well... I…

God: Last month you didn’t want to go to Hinjewadi… coz you liked driving your bike to office…. And cribbing session lasted a week… so I started working on the problem…

Me: Ya… but I didn’t know… wait…working on….??

God: Two weeks later your friends planned their move to Hinjewadi… and then you wanted to go too… Another 10 days of cribbing… so I had to undo all the meddling I had done… and rework... do u like to rework... coz customer didn’t know what he wanted..????

Me: You meddled too...

God: What did you think… things just happen…? I have to meddle in people’s heads to give other people what they want…

Me: You do that… now I know… you meddler…

God: So what… now that you are having a good time going to office… enjoying the view… again Shahrukh Khan is God… why why… (He is imitating me…)

Me: I just saw DDLJ over the weekend… Hangover…

God: Hangover… Really… Anyway a week in the new office and you start cribbing again…

Me: I didn’t crib…

God: ‘Why do I have to wake up at 7.45…why why..’ (Repeat 20 times… 5 mornings in a row)… what do you call that…

Me: Lack of sleep…

God: Oh… trying to be smart… you need to be fixed…

Suddenly Mac cut into the conversation and the call got disconnected…

Mac (teasing me): So you would be going by the office bus at 8 am from tomorrow… instead of coming by my car... Good luck… Get up on time or you will miss the bus…

Me (in my head): Oh my God (literally)... He is meddling... Stop cribbing... Stop cribbing…



Moral: Don’t annoy the Big Guy with little problems... He is also trying to do his best I guess…

PS: This does not mean I stopped cribbing… just trying hard not to…

Me, my leg and....

How to break a leg…..

Walk down a road and think of something other than the road… that’s all it takes… in my case the road was empty… No… there were no vehicles or people or animals… and yet I fell… and this was no ordinary fall… as my leg finally decided to protest against all the extra kgs I make it carry around nowadays…
So spraining itself, my leg tried to put me into a very good 1 month rest, as the doctor very eagerly wanted to put plaster for a month…. I tried to protest… but I lost...
So here I was with Dynaplast, which is supposed to be a better version of the normal plaster of paris... well trust me… I have no experience with the latter but this is no good either…. There can be no good/easy/comfortable way of carrying extra luggage with you all the time….
Now patience is a virtue I do not posses and sometimes… ok most of the time impatience takes over my mind… so even though my leg is not all better… but just the fact that it granted me the permission to walk I took the liberty to start jumping around… driving my new bike.. which by the way is very heavy.. I also went for a 5 day summer camp… along with the dynaplast.. oh it was so much fun… and ya my leg was not too happy about it… but you see I had promised it that I would rest… a lot after coming back…. but when I came back I tried to do more for the leg then I should have… see I thought, my leg went into such a bad state after a simple sprain simple due the heavy load I’m subjecting it to… so I should take exercising seriously… and so I started going to the ‘Tekdi’(which is a small hill for the uninitiated).. the leg hurt… but I kept telling it that this is for your own good.. this is what would be beneficial in the long run… and I meant that…. But my leg… Just wanted to get back at me…
So one fine day… walking down the hill… simply walking… doing nothing special… I fall….
And this time my leg gave me a dose of real pain… pain… oh my god pain… it was the grandmother of all the pain I have ever felt in my life………..the…. ok ok.. I will stop... but I’m not exaggerating …it was horrible…..
And well this time my leg made sure I could move for a month at least….. So here I am… posting this blog… sitting at home… giving my leg royal massages…. Hoping that this time the rest would be enough for His Highness to grant me permission to jump around…!!